My teenage years were the worst without God! Looking back, I am overwhelmed by His faithfulness in seeing me through all my difficult moments and eventually bringing me into this wonderful relationship with Him.
I grew up in a non-Christian family and never believed in God. I had friends who tried reaching out to me but my heart was hardened. I was never interested in hearing more about the “Christian God”. During my teenage years, I lived a life that was filled with anger, fears, insecurities, negativity and loneliness as I saw no purpose in life. I had to deal with immense pressure at home and in school and also struggled with depressing thoughts that no one knew about. With all that I was dealing with at age 15, I ended up turning to self-harm to numb my pain. Self-harming was my main outlet of release but deep down inside me, my heart still felt hurt and empty. One day I decided to give up and end my life. I took pills thinking that by the next morning it would all be over and I would not have to go through the pain again. Thankfully, that was not God’s plan for me!
Having overdosed on pills, I was immediately sent to the hospital to seek medical help and was also referred to see a psychiatrist. Everything seemed like a downward spiral, but all these happened for a reason; God came and rescued me! It was during my stay in the hospital that I met someone who brought me to church. I was hesitant and sceptical at first in the God that everyone believes. However, God moved in His own way and I encountered His presence during one of the church services. God filled me with His love and reminded me that He is the perfect Father who loves me. It was at that point when I felt liberated from all my pains & hurts.
After my encounter with God, I came to accept Him as my Lord and Saviour. God brought me through a season of healing and finding my identity & purpose in Him. Nothing changed overnight, I still struggled with negative thoughts, temptations to self-harm but I now know that God understands and remains faithful even in my struggles. As I sought after His heart and grow closely with Him each day, I begin to find joy and worth in this life that I am living. I am now convinced that the purpose of my life is to live to share the love of Christ to the people around me.
I am no longer ashamed but confident to share about my past because I know that my story is a testimony of His goodness and I will use it for His glory. The idea of God’s unconditional love is hard to comprehend. His love for us is so great that He would allow us to go through trying seasons but would see us through with His promise that He will never leave nor forsake us!
Growing up as a child who hated school, I skipped most of my classes and found myself in the wrong company of gang members and drug addicts. I dabbled in narcotics at a young age and soon and was placed in a drug rehabilitation centre at the age of 15.
As a result of all the troubles I had gotten myself into, I was in and out of prison a total of six times and put in the military detention twice. Close to 20 years of my life was spent incarcerated.
You may be thinking, “How can you be so comfortable and open with sharing about your past?” The answer to that is that I’m not. However, it is a great testimony of how God can change lives, how God is so real, how forgiving God is and how God looks after His children. I first came to know Christ when I attended a Sunday Church Service by a foreign preacher. I’ve never felt anything like that before. God’s message of love and salvation truly touched and transformed me and totally changed my life. I was baptized five months after that church service.
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.” 2 Cor 5:17. Indeed I’m a completely changed person as promised in His word. I now have a new identity in Christ and a whole new sense of purpose in life. Serving the most high God is truly a great joy and honour. I’m so grateful that the Lord picked me up and saved me. I still have to battle with challenges and temptations every day but I thank God for everything He has done for me. One of the things is how God orchestrated and placed my beautiful soon-to-be wife in my life. I will leave that amazing story for another day!
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